Question of the Week 11/12/03:

For the last few months, one subject has drawn more people to www.BossytheCow.com than any other: Testostazine. Between similar "masculine enhancement pills", the Hair Club for Men, various patches, and other goodies, the internet is full of products to help you be more of a man. But here at the QotW, it's our job to stay ahead of the trends. So we want to know:

WHAT WILL BE THE NEXT BIG PRODUCT FOR MEN?


It sure would be nice if someone would start making some video games, sports
cars, and pornography for men.

Metrosexual bread products to replace fast food side dishes--"Queer rye for the straight fry."

I received a spam titled "Attract Men With Bigger Breasts," so apparently the next big product is male bust enhancements.

The rest of the 23rd chromosome.

The classic Ferrari Testarosa is reengineered as the completely obvious Testosterosa.

I dunno, but I bet it's byyyy Mennen!

Just make sure it's deep fried, and we're all good.

Amazon.com's new Foreign Brides category
"Read a review of brides from Uruguay..."

Compassionate patriarchy

GPS implants, for those who are serious about never asking directions.

Why not just come out and say, "WHAT'S THE NEXT EMBIGGENING PRODUCT FOR MEN?"  What?  Yes, that means "to make bigger."  It's a perfectly cromulent word...

Manties!  www.manties.net  (OK, not new, but trust me--these babies are gonna go mainstream any day now)

Old Spice Aftershave
This tasty melange is recommended by Guild Steersmen the galaxy over for its subtle and life-altering effects.

Pine Tree Shaped Air Fresheners. Find one in every car. You'll see.

Bar Mitzvah key chains with a voice chip that says,"Today, I am a man!"

Viagragain - cure hair loss *and* um, that other problem.

Is another season of Stripperella too much to ask for?

X-Ray goggles so they can see though women... who are standing in front of the TV.

Tired of your mail-order Russian bride?  Call now for your mail-order Kazakh liason!

The One Ring™

That Vogon Mystique - Now in the convenient 600 ounce spray gun. The boots, the machismo, the rubber...

JarJarase™ - Allows the home viewers to instantly remove all appearances of Jar Jar Binks from the new Star Wars films in a vain attempt to differentiate them from toxic waste.

Because I'm sure none of the QotW community can resist another post of this link:
http://edition.cnn.com/2003/SHOWBIZ/TV/11/05/offbeat.pornstar.tv.ap/
(Note:  technically, this is also for "for wives and girlfriends who enjoy both reality TV and adult entertainment."  But the question didn't ask if it was JUST for men, despite the obvious female attraction to this show.)

Breast Implants.
Oh, sorry, that was the LAST big product for men...

Neck Ruffles- You too can look like a bird who swallowed a plate!

Giant Wooden Badgers!

i8trak™

Little Timmy Miller's Unsquishable Pudding Cup (pat. pend.)

SimBritney™

How about a T.V. station devoted to the stuff guys *really* want? We could call it something manly like Spike TV, or... wha? Fine. It's big, right?

Pop-up books

A new line of underware by Ashton Kutcher.

Penis shorteners for when you OD on HGH and your shorts don't fit anymore.

After trying all those other products -- pumps, patches, prostheses, prescriptions -- you're going to need our NEW P.ENIL.E RESTORATION KIT! Repair the damage and get back those inconstant, modestly-sized erecti0ns you used to have.  Your lover may not worship you for it, but she won't withdraw in disgust, either!  ORDER TODAY!

If blowjob incentive isn't the next big product for men, what is??
http://www.semenex.com/home.html
 

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